News

**Monkeyfister** · (This post was last modified: 10-27-2012 05:10 AM by Monkeyfister.)

In order to disrupt the elections; declare Martial Law; take all of our guns; force Gay Marriage on every man, woman, child, Box Turtle and dog; and make every person in America have an abortion at gun point.

I swear I saw it on Drudge, but the Obamunists must have hacked his site and banned it.

Maybe it was at Breitbart.

Could have been my fillings channeling Sorcha Faal, again, come to think of it.

Also too-- FEMA Camps!!!

Also too, too-- Al Gore is FAT!!!!!!

Discuss.

**Monkeyfister** · (This post was last modified: 10-27-2012 02:39 AM by Monkeyfister.)

Perhaps Hurricane Sandy is just a HUGE HOAX designed to launder unsuspecting "Red Cross" Donors' money to build an underground High-Speed Rail FEMA Train? Might explain all the underground BOOOOMS we've been logging here.

ETA: This sounds even easier and cheaper. But then, never let a perfectly good disaster go to waste, right?

**The Lucky AC** Everything in life is luck User ID: 888 10-27-2012 03:15 AM

And any guy that doesn't want to be in a threesome with Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann must be communist, or gay!

**DirtyAnnie**

X lop guest User ID: 112042 10-27-2012 03:18 AM

You're especially full of shit tonight.

**vintagevixen**

DirtyAnnie Wrote:

Monkey's been reached

vv

**Monkeyfister** · (This post was last modified: 10-27-2012 03:36 AM by Monkeyfister.)

The Lucky AC Wrote:

And any guy that doesn't want to be in a threesome with Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann must be communist, or gay!

Ummm....

Todd Palin and Marcus Bachmann will BY OBAMUNIST GAY LAW be having 3-way with you too.

[Image: 6CDA_508B3A84.jpg]

**AC488** I got no balls User ID: 488 10-27-2012 03:36 AM

Obama: 'Help Us Destroy Jesus And Start A New Age Of Liberal Darkness'

[Image: 635t.jpg]

CHARLOTTE, NC—With the savage roar of the heathen Democratic horde rising all around him, President Barack Obama delivered an incendiary speech to close his party’s national convention Thursday night, commanding the ultraprogressive minions in attendance to help him “destroy Jesus and usher in a new age of liberal darkness that shall reign o’er the earth for a thousand years.”

The thunderous 45-minute address—during which the president argued for a second term so that he could “finally kill Jesus once and for all, as well as all those who worship him”—was well received by the frenzied, wild-eyed audience, whose piercing chants of “Four more years!” and “Slaughter the believers!” echoed throughout the Time Warner Cable Arena.

“My fellow Americans and godless infidels, I command you to join me as we cast an endless pall of far-left evil across the hills and valleys of our nation!” Obama bellowed from the stage, as thousands in attendance moaned in compliance and gyrated their hips and groins in a lascivious dance. “Together, as a barbarian people forged by the wicked flames of irreligiosity and united by visions of a liberal dystopia, we will rise up as one to scorch the earth with boundless amorality.”

“The streets shall run red with the blood of forced sodomy, performed daily upon every American man, woman, and child!” the commander-in-chief shouted, froth forming around his mouth as the crowd threw hundreds of aborted fetuses onto the stage. “Die, Christians, die!”

http://www.theonion.com/articles/obama-h...-of,29478/

yeah3

**Monkeyfister** · (This post was last modified: 10-27-2012 06:35 AM by Monkeyfister.)

X Wrote:

You're especially full of shit tonight.

Well, we can leave my difficulties reaching a De-Regulated, FREE-TRADE, Unpaid Overtime, No-Benefits Labor Agreement with certain Cummunistic UNION factions of my Intestinal Flora aside, but you might find yourself in a position where you would have WISHED you be able to declare a freshly re-defined LEGITIMATE RAPE when Obama's FORCED GAY HUSBAND, BIG BROTHUH BUBBA, shows up at your door at 8am with the FEDERAL Marriage Papers.

Could be one vote-- YOUR VOTE-- that prevents that... or allows it to happen.

Just think about that.

Now, I'm not your CEO, or your Boss telling which way to vote, like we keep hearing about on the internet, just giving you something to r e a l l y think about.

I just think that we're two weeks out from the election, and people need to think about what's really important to them.

Could just as easily be Bobby the Gay Box Turtle, or Bowser the Ashamed Boxer showing up at the door with those FEDERAL Marriage Papers, from what I hear from our Senators and Congressmen, the internet, and emails.

**Monkeyfister** · **Monkeyfister** CENSORED User ID: 99872 10-27-2012 04:29 AM **Posts: 3,691**

vintagevixen Wrote:

DirtyAnnie Wrote:

Monkey's been reached

vv

Not even close... flying strong.

**Monkeyfister** · (This post was last modified: 10-27-2012 06:38 AM by Monkeyfister.)

I think we MUST consider, also too, the Godless libruls' attacks on us Conservatives rejecting Science. Not too long ago, General J.C. Christian, Patriot, did an in-depth study of Conservative Republican Scientific Breakthroughs-- other than our breakthroughs in Creation and Climate Science-- and compiled an incredibly detailed list:

http://patriotboy.blogspot.com/2012/04/r...ience.html

Quote:We hear a lot about conservative advancements in creation and climate science, but very little about other great Republican scientific achievements. Here's a list of a few of our most patriotic discoveries:

-- Particulate-induced asthma is good for children. It causes them to breath less carbon monoxide.
-- No unbiased observer has ever witnessed the female orgasm.
-- Oil is organic. It's good for people.
-- If God wanted us to have recreational sex, He wouldn't have made sex so off-putting - women wouldn't vomit every time they did it.
-- Coal soot acts like sunblock against the deadly effects of chemtrails.
-- Preborn girls are created when a sperm person gives up one of his ribs.
-- Fish choose to shape their mouths in an obscene manner. It is not an innate characteristic. They can be cured.
-- Human civilization began in Branson, Missouri.
-- Gravity is a lie. We all have angels pushing down on our heads. --- Sometimes Catholic priests and protestant youth ministers have to help the angels push down on heads.
-- Even animals have angels pushing down on them. Except birds. They're Satanic communists.
-- During the rapture, angels will stop pushing down on the righteous.
-- Rain doesn't fall. Angels just point their squirtguns downward. Same is true for pee.
-- Polar bears are suicidal. They want to become extinct.
-- A man's uterus is the only organ that can function outside of his body.

This is an older study, I would recommend adding NCAA Collegiate Athletic Directors, Truly Righteous Politicians, and Boy Scout Leaders to the list of those who have to help the angels push down on heads.

I concur that birds are evil communists. Probably First Adapters to the UN's Agenda 21 to control the population of the planet. They are probably part of the Male Sex Drive Control Forces to stop SO CALLED "over-population." Most birds, by now, are probably DARPA constructs.

And sometimes, the Good Lord demands some proper, but not necessarily Legitimate, rape to make a stubborn woman appreciate her place in the Circle of God's Creation. It's His Will.

**Monkeyfister** · (This post was last modified: 10-27-2012 05:46 AM by Monkeyfister.)

Those Godless, Sinning Gamblers in Las Vegas are actually betting on the outcome. One of these petty hedonistic Houses of Racontourism, some nbothing place called INTRADE, have "odds" on the Kenyan CommunoFascistSocialistic Homosexualist Gun-Grabbing Usurper Hawaiian Devil Baby's re-election at:

63.7% CHANCE
Last prediction was: $6.37 / share
Today's Change: +$0.16

Clearly Satan himself is talking directly into their ears.

America and the world are fucqing DOOOOOOMED!!!!!!!!!!111ty!!!

**The Evil AC** I am not a number!!! User ID: 666 10-27-2012 05:45 AM

**Monkeyfister** · (This post was last modified: 10-27-2012 05:53 AM by Monkeyfister.)

The Evil AC Wrote:

But Marcus Bachmann is FAAAAABULISS!!!

But Not Gay.

ABSOLUTELY NOT Gay.

He Prays the Gay Away©, so... definitely NOT GAY, so stop saying that!!!

**bbkingdom**

If everybody in America would all fart at the same time....